


You need to leave him

by LeftoverFT



Series: You need to let go [2]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Cheating, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Cheating, M/M, Sadstuck, Sol cheats on eridan, and Eridan says nope
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-06
Updated: 2016-11-09
Packaged: 2018-08-13 08:03:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,551
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7968781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LeftoverFT/pseuds/LeftoverFT
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One half of the ending to 'You Decided to Do This?'</p><p>You can't keep this up, you love him, but it will never be the same. </p><p> </p><p>This story leads to three potential endings for the story 'You Decided To Do This?'. In it Eridan decides to leave Sollux. If you wanted him to keep being with Sollux, read this stories other half, You can't leave him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. You need to look forward

**Author's Note:**

> This is a chose your own ending story. This side of the story has three potential endings that after chapter 2, you'll be able to chose from. 
> 
> Enjoy

You were back at Tavros's place, sitting on his couch, watching him and Dave talk about some sort of video game. You watched Dave's chest, seeing it rise and fall smoothly with each breath. It was soothing to see someone so calm.

You closed your eyes, thinking back to your first date with Sollux. He had taken you to some crappy seafood restaurant. You both ordered sushi, and bickered the whole time about if pop or indie music was better. In the end, you both ended up getting food poisoning, and staying over at your house.

You smiled and laid back, curling against a pillow. You loved Sollux, but you hated him so much.

You couldn't remember falling asleep, just waking up an hour later to your phone ringing.

You checked the I.D, seeing it was Sollux who had waken you up. You groaned, rubbing your temples and laying your head back down. You weren't going to answer him.

Your phone eventually quieted down, and you sighed in relief. You stretched, hearing your back pop.

Tavros joined you soon enough, sitting down beside your legs. You enjoyed seeing his calming smile, it helped calm your own worried nerves.

"You get a call?"

You sighed in frustration. "Yea, he's sent me a few texts too."

Tavros gave you a sympathetic look and rubbed your leg. "Well, take the time you need, don't feel rushed. Think things through, okay."

You nodded again, sitting up. Your head felt foggy and your chest was tight, but you didn't want to keep laying around. "Tav, I wanna do something. I wanna go out somewhere, and not just around ya neighborhood."

You watched Tavros look a bit conflicted, he still didn't want you to leave and get overwhelmed. He knew yo weren't any good in crowds. After a few beats of silence, he agreed.

"We can head to the mall?" You felt relief sweep over you, he had not only agreed to let you out of the house, but he was also coming with you, and taking you to one of your favorite places. The mall near you had several cloth and book stores, so you could pick out some fabric to add to your small collection, you were eventually going to make as quilt, but you wanted it to be extravagant, and grab a few books too.

"Yea, I would like that a lot." You had to admit though, you looked like a mess. And my like thirteen year old you, like adult you who hasn't taken a shower in a couple days and needs to fix his hair.

Tavros agreed that you needed to straighten yourself up, with a small giggle and a push towards the bathroom.

As you stood in the shower, you thought about what you were going to do. You couldn't go back to Sollux, not now. You felt terrible, he made you feel terrible.

And he probably still wanted sex, hell, he probably wanted you and Karkat to 'go at it' with him. But you're not sure you could do that. The idea of sleeping with him- either of them really- just didn't sound appealing or right. He slept with someone else behind your back, and having sex with him now just sounds bad. Thinking about him in that way doesn't do much for you besides make you want to sob.

You lean back into the warm spray of water, letting it cascade down you. Everything was too much. Why can't life be simpler? You date someone, you marry them, and nothing else. You're just happy forever.

You thought you and Sollux were going to get married some day. Gay marriage was legalized not long ago, and when you both found out, he was so ecstatic, you thought he'd propose on the spot if he had the chance. You both agreed to wait a little while, until you were at least out of collage. You suppose those plans are out the window.

Gay marriage is legal, but polyamorous marriage isn't. And you're not sure it'd be the same as just you and Sollux even if it was.

You sigh, biting at your lips and cut the water off. You've been in there long enough. You dry yourself off and dress in some spare clothes Tavros kept out for you.

After combing your hair and brushing your teeth, you stepped out, seeing Tavros on his phone.

He perked up when he saw you, putting the device away and getting up.

"Ready to go? I'll drive!"

You nodded and headed out with him, grabbing your coat and wallet on the way out. Once in the car, it was a quiet, nice ride. Music played, but you didn't pay much attention, mainly listened to the beat and kept to your thoughts.

In the mall you were more talkative. You and Tavros started conversations in different, small things. Gossip and latest fads. After buying some nice, red cloth, softer than most of the others, you were headed to a small book store.

"And then he- wait! Eridan, do you see that?" He pointed off into a direction and you looked to see where he intended you to look.

"No, what?"

"That shop is having a Harry Potter sale!" And he was right, a fairly large store that normally only sold things Dave's brother Dirk would be into, was having a sale on your favorite book.

You both briskly walked in, you heading straight for the Harry Potter area. While looking through everything, Tavros kept close beside you, laughing at all the Pokémon objects about.

Once you had grabbed a few themed sweaters and scarfs, you headed for the check out. Today must have been a heaven sent day, cause the total only came out to be sixty dollars compared to the original hundred twenty that it would have been any other normal day.

Holding your bags, you started to head back to the stores entrance, where Tavros was waiting. On your way, yellow caught your eye. Turning you saw Sollux, and what a surprise, Karkat was with him. He had obviously seen you as well, waving over to you.

You nodded to him, but continued to walk. You weren't going to be rude, but you also weren't going to talk to him. He didn't follow you, but you suspected it was because your Cancer friend was holding onto him and whispering, what you assumed were calming words, to him.

You made it to Tavros in one piece, composed and put together. He saw what had you on edge and quickly led you out.

"Still want to go book shopping?"

"No."

You both headed to his car, silence enveloping you both. You sat in the passenger seat, tense and quiet.

"Sorry, I didn't think he'd be here." Tavros looked sadly at the road, pulling out of the parking lot.

"It's fine, we wouldn't have known anyways, that prick has always popped up at the worst of times." You stared out the window, listening to Tavros's sigh.

When you both got home, you wandered to your room, setting down your latest purchases. You shuffle through it, picking up the fabric you bought.

You'll have to leave it in the bag, you realize. The rest of your collection is at yours and Sollux's house, and you're not going to go drop it off or something.

You placed your new clothes in scarfs in the small closet, running your hand over their material.

Not long later, Tavros called you to dinner, chatting with you about Dave.

"Yea, he had to walk my dog for awhile, cause he had lost a game against me. It was some weird Hannah Montana game he bought for 99¢. It was terrible." Tavros chuckled and picked at his food.

You laughed a little as well, imagining the two playing such a game. "So, what are you two now?"

You couldn't hold back your curiosity, and watched as Tavros laughed at your question.

"You mean, are we dating? No, we tried, didn't last three days. We're better off as friends! Hahah," he chuckled a little more, and you were starting to blush a bit, feeling a little awkward.

"Oh, I kinda expected you to be, you know."

"Yea, it's fine. Just made me laugh, cause Gamzee thought the same thing, but before I could tell him we weren't together, he went off on a long rant of how he'd beat Dave into a pulp if he so much as made me frown. Hahah, by the end of it, I was laughing so hard, he looked worried."

You smiled, knowing the tall, clown-lover was pretty protective over his friends.

You finished your meal with ease, the atmosphere being quite light and fun. You headed to your room, and despite seeing Sollux, today was fun. You haven't felt this relieved and happy in a while, and here you are, feeling like almost nothing happened.

It was an easy, happy feeling, and it shattered when your phone went off. You quickly put yourself together, and walked over to your phone.

Sollux was calling you again. You thought it over and released a sigh. You grabbed the little device and hit answer, setting it next to your ear.

"Eridan? Is that you?" You sat down on the bed, listening to Sollux.

"Yea, it's me."

"Thank god, I've been trying to call you for awhile now. I- we need to speak."

You hummed to yourself, "yea, we do. It's been awhile."

"Babe, Eridan, I'm so sorry. I know what I did was wrong. Please come home, Karkat wants to meet with you again, we've both been so worried. You and I don't have to jump right back in, and Karkat doesn't have to join in, now or ever, but please come home. I miss you, Eri." You could feel your chest constricting, your heartbeat quicken, and you knew Sollux's was to, you could tell by how heavily he was breathing.

"Sol, I-"

"I know, I know, this was your one rule. I know I broke it, but I'm sorry, and I'll do anything. I've fucked up before, we both have, but we got past it tougher, so please, come home."

You bit your lip and squeezed your eyes together. You weren't going to cry. You weren't going to cry.

Please don't cry. Not right now, not in the phone.

"Baby?"

"Please, just. Give me a second." You breathe, trying to dry your eyes and calm yourself. It felt like you ate a pound of rocks. You tried to level your breathing and speak, but your throat felt tight and your eyes felt heavy. You had to do this, you can't keep pushing this off. You put down one rule, and he broke it. You have to do this.

"Sollux. I've been thinking too, and I want to meet up sometime soon."

You heard Sollux let out a sigh of relief, and you wanted to break down and sob. Why is he so happy to see you? Can't he tell by how you phrased it that you're not bringing good news?

"Okay. Okay, thank you. Thanks, Eri. We can meet tomorrow, at our house? How about around noon?" You noticed how he sounded much more at ease, and it hurt so much.

You knew he loved you still, it was obvious by how much he wanted to see you, to apologize and fix things. And God, or hurt to not be able to just agree and crawl back into his arms. But you can't, you can't be used like this, and you can't see yourself ever giving him what he wants, a polyamorous relationship with Karkat. And you don't want to make him stop loving Karkat, because they'd work together, they'd make a great couple. So you had to do this.

"Okay, tomorrow. I'll send you then." You pushed out, wincing at how weak you sounded.

"Yes, okay, thank you Eri. And one more thing, can you tell Tavros that I'm sorry? I had called him earlier, and we got in a small fight. Now he won't answer me."

You didn't see a reason why you couldn't do that for him.

"Yea, sure."

"Thanks Eridan. See you tomorrow, I love you."

You could feel your restraint wearing then. You wanted to tell him, wanted to return the sentiment because you loved him. You loved Sollux so much, and everything hurt so bad. You wanted to reverse time, go back to a few weeks ago when he was hugging you gently and cuddled up to your back as you both tried to fall asleep. You wanted to tell him that you were sorry, that you didn't mean to be stubborn and seem off put by every little thing all the time, that you're fine with this, you'll do anything for him, with him.

Instead, you choke out a small, "see you," and hang up. The second you set your phone down, you give up.

You collapse onto your pillow and sob like you're three again. You hold onto the comforter and cry, rubbing at your eyes like it will help stop the tears.

You want to curl up and sleep, and never wake again. You can hardly breathe, and you're choking on tears and spit by now, but you don't stop.

You cry, your faces pressed into the pillow, mouth open to pull in shaky, shallow breaths. You hold onto your tee-shirt, right over your heart, like it will stop the pain. You know you're loud, but you can't help it. The love of your life is about to be out of your life, and everything hurts.

Tavros might hear you, but he says nothing, and doesn't come in, and for that, you're glad.

That night you cry until all you have left in you is a few sore hiccups. You're shaking terribly, and your glasses are long discarded. All you can do it shake and slowly fall into a light slumber.


	2. It's Over

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> :-) sorry for late chapter. This will lead to the three endings.

You got dressed slowly, pulling on your pants and sweater with dread. Seeing your, you weren't sure what to call him, saying boyfriend was a bit much, but he isn't your ex.

Karkat would be there too, you remember, sitting in your house. It might as well be his, he comes over all the time, and he's probably been over there even more since you've been gone.

You felt tired. Too tired, like lifting your arms was as straining as running 1000 miles. You sat back down onto the guest bed and sighed loudly. This was going to be a hard task to complete, but hopefully, you'd be left happy.

You left your room after some debate and headed into the main room. Tavros and Dave were there, Dave chatting quietly about Tavros's smaller dog. When he spotted Eridan, he sent him a small smile and waved to him.

"Oh, hey Eridan. Sleep well?" Tavros asked politely.

"Wonderfully. Best sleep I've had in years," your head lolled backwards, and you popped your neck.

"No need to be so sassy. What's got your metaphorical panties in a twist. Unless you are wearing panties. Which is cool," Dave almost started up a long rant on underwear, but you interjected.

"I'm visitin Sollux today."

Dave stopped talking immediately and sipped at his drink. Tavros looked uncomfortable for a second before nodding.

"Yea, if you need anything, call me. I'll be there as soon as possible." He looked at you with such kind eyes, you couldn't begin to comprehend how you made a friend like him.

You nodded, letting him know you would. You slid out of your seat slowly, heading towards the door to put on your shoes.

"Well, I should be headin out now, then. I'll call if I need anythin." You were almost out the door when you felt a hand on your shoulder. You quickly turned to see Dave, the blond looking down at you.

You bit your lip, feeling him look you over. It's been awhile since anyone, even Sollux, had looked at you so closely. No one had cared enough to look at you longer than they needed to, and you didn't need them to look at you because you had Sollux for that.

"Hey," he whispered, catching your attention, "hey, I know Tav already told you to call him, but I know it can be hard to show such a weak side of yourself to your close friends. It feels like you're burdening them, right? But don't worry dude, you really aren't. But in case you really don't want to come here after whatever goes down, you can call me. I'll come by, and we can have some fun, I'll be your shoulder and shit, okay?"

You already wanted to cry, and you hadn't even made it to your house yet. You accepted his number, putting it in your phone and giving him yours.

You were about to turn and leave when he pulled you into a hug. You could feel your chest constrict, and you hugged back. It felt nice to receive such affections after all that had happened.

You did leave after that, making your way to your car carefully. Driving to your house was a quick, anxiety filled trip, every turn you took made you want to go home.

Once you had actually arrived, you sat back in your car and took a deep breath. You could do this. You got out, and with each step you took, your chest felt a little tighter. By the time you had reached the door, you could hardly breathe.

You knocked twice, then thought about how Sollux had always loved things in doubles, then you knocked a third time.

When the door open, your breath caught in your throat when you saw him, and his face lit up when he saw you. He smiled and stepped aside to let you in.

"Eri- babe, I'm glad you actually came. I was a little worried you wouldn't show, but I should've known, an Ampora doesn't back down. Right?" He sat down at your shared couch, and you followed suit.

You made a small noise in the back of your throat to state that you had heard him, but stayed silent besides that.

He didn't looked deterred, just nodded and kept up his smile.

God you loved him. Every time he was in trouble with you, he'd always keep a smile on, cause he knew you hated it when he'd scowl.

"Kar will be here in a bit. What can," he stopped and licked his lips, "what do you want to talk about first?"

You sat back and sighed, rubbing your temples. "Sol, why'd- how," you started over, "how did you cheatin on me seem like a reasonable way to go about things?"

He looked sheepish, like he hadn't wanted you to bring up that little detail.

"Well I uh, I really didn't think you'd mind it that much? Because you can Karkat were already friends, and I didn't think it'd cause any damage," he was shrouded against the other side of the couch and you felt your ears burn. Blood was rushing to your face before you could think to much about it, and you realized how mad you really were.

"So you thought cheatin on me with one of my closest friends, one I thought I could trust, would make me more susceptible to your wants?" You were practically grinding your teeth together from your anger.

"I- yea? It was stupid, and I'm sorry, but we've been through worse!" He tried to recover.

"No we fuckin haven't, this is the worst thing you've done yet. I don't care if you're sorry, we had one rule!" You wanted to cry, scream, and sock Sollux in the face all at once.

"I know, but I couldn't help it! I didn't mean to love him too, and if I could, then I wouldn't have. You can't just throw away all the years we've been together," you stood up, and he followed you up.

You look him over, and your heart finally agrees with your brain. You don't want to see this man anymore.

"You're right, I can't, because you already have. It's over." You turn on your heel, listening to him try to force out words behind you.

"Eridan! Please, we can fix this, we don't- don't leave!"

You slammed the door open, almost hitting Karkat in the face, and stomped past. You looked back at him and sneered.

"Tell your boyfriend that I'll be pickin up my stuff later," you only watched his face crumble before you turned towards your car, ready to leave.

Once in your car, you started it up and headed out. You didn't know where you were headed, but you knew it was away from here, away from Sollux and away from Karkat.

You clutched a hand over your heart and drove off into a small parking lot. You parked and sat back, taking a deep breath.

Everything hurt, but your mind felt a little more at ease. You felt incredibly alone.

Maybe that's what you needed? Maybe you should call someone? It was hard to tell, and who should you call? Dave? Tavros? Maybe you should just stay alone, leave yourself to your thoughts.


End file.
